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Monday, April 28, 2014

The Mean Mom

I like to think of myself as being easy going as a mother. I think I laid a good foundation for my kids when they were very young. It's made the teenage years less angst-y, if that's possible. Don't get me wrong, we've had rolled eyes, pouting and bad attitudes, but when it's good, it's easy.

I am most proud of what great students Trevor and Tuesday are. I set the bar so high with them and never let them get away with anything less than outstanding. Got a B on a test or paper? We always talked about what they could have done more to have gotten that A. It's never been shaming, it's been constructive.

When we were all together, Trevor and Tuesday had a heated competition for who had the best grades in the house. It was good natured and healthy for them. Always trying to outdo one another, I was a mom blessed with kids with straight A's.

That first year school year when Tim and I divorced, Trevor got his first C on a report card. I had a hard time with that. Not because of the C so much, but that what we were going through as a family was affecting Trevor. He ended up rallying though.

Which brings me to the reason I'm thinking about this so much today. Tuesday had a math test last Thursday. She has been sitting on a 100.56% in math and she informed me when she got in the car that she was sure she failed her test. Failed? Ugh. With Tuesday, in math, failure is subjective. A C is consided a failure to her. A low B is also not usually on her radar. We found out her grade today, 2/10. Two out of ten!! I gave her a stern talking to because no way is a two out of ten anywhere near acceptable. It never matters to me what any of the other kids did on the test, it doesn't matter to me that even her equally smart BFF's failed the test also. Tuesday FAILED? Her 100.56% nose dived to a 95.66%. Thank the dear Lord Jesus Christ that this teacher allows full credit retakes!!

Via Pinterest. Pinned this weekend not knowing how appropriate it would be today.

And here is the part that I love about Tuesday, she took her stern talking to and then we discussed what went wrong and how she was going to fix it. She explained to me what she did wrong on the first section and how to fix it. And while i understood NOTHING about what she was talking about, it's important for me to hear what she has to say. I can gauge the way she explains it to me and know that she knows the problem. The teacher handed back the test and Tuesday is upstairs right now redoing all the questions she got wrong, mastering the concepts that she got wrong, and preparing for a test that hasn't been scheduled yet.

It's not about her being scared of me or being upset because she let me down, it's all about her. SHE does not accept failure if there is a chance to do better. I have full confidence in her and I love that about her as a student. I'm pretty dang proud of her.


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